FYI, New Parents

New babies understand the art of torture. Sleep deprivation has a subtle yet profound long-term effect that eventually affects the judgement of the subject, even making him/her the victim of his/her own errors. That’s why all new parents ignore the following advice at their peril:

  • It’s really not a good idea to apply cooking oil spray to the BBQ grill after it is lit.

  • Don’t try to save time by pulling on a t-shirt while running up stairs.

  • Burp before bounce.

  • Picnic note: Animals love spit-up. Keep the kid out of reach of cats and seagulls.

  • Gas while changing the diaper is a universal warning sign.

  • Be prepared to engage the 2AM regulars at Shoppers. They love to chat.

More soon!

The Simon Eye.

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