It hit me like a hammer last night. I spend most of my time surrounded by women. I just wish it was because they find me irresistible. It’s not like that. Yesterday was the first of my 12-week carpentry course at Algonquin College. The course represents a notable break in my usual routine. Which is why I found it troubling that my biggest concern last night was what to wear. My casual brown leather slip-ons did make me feel a bit self-conscious in a room of steel toes. There were lots of tight t-shirts, faded jeans and farm caps with curled brims. I was the only one taking notes, mostly…

I’m feeling a bit more settled this week. More than I have in months, in fact. Last week’s visits to prisons in western Canada may have had something to do with it. I’m also reading a sappy little meditation book by Thich Nhat Hahn. It’s borderline “Chicken Soup for the Buddhist Consumer,” but the message is solid. The foundation is impermanance. The past doesn’t exist, nor does the future. Life is only this second. For me, my life is writing this blog. For you, it’s reading it. Thanks! Likewise, we aren’t born and we don’t die, much like waves on the sea. They’re all just water, changing. I like the…

I fixed my sister-in-law’s clogged plumbing today (sink and toilet), with the help of her 10-year-old son Rowan. We took the drains apart under the sink, back to the wall, and cleared sludgy black plugs out of the curves with a rooter wire that resembled a tape worm. The contractor who put those pipes in was lazy — no quick-release in the trap, and a botched patch to the main line to the drain. The whole operation was stinky, disgusting and very satisfying. I’d forgotten how great it can feel to get dirty. Since Jasper and Simon have come along, I spend a lot less time in rubber boots or…

In Alberta, they call their premier King. He rules over a rich land (even if bookstores are scarce). There’s no provincial sales tax, billions of dollars are being invested in hospitals and infrastructure, and new rules govern chuck wagon racing. It’s all good. The money is literally being pumped from the ground. This week, King Ralph announced a “prosperity bonus” for all 3,184,000 citizens. Everybody’s getting a cheque for $400 bucks. Yee haw! That’s $1.3 billion bucks. The reaction, not surprisingly, has been positive. But that doesn’t mean the prosperity bonus is a good idea. Consider this: Ralph Klein wins elections bashing the federal government. His gift to Albertans is…

I’m sitting in Calgary airport watching CNN on mute in Montana’s Saloon. My quarter chicken (white meat) meal is picked to the bone and two pints of Rickards gone. Every couple of minutes the same images flash on the screen: An airbus lands gingerly on its hind wheels and its front wheel bursts into flames. My flight to Toronto leaves in about 45 minutes. People all around avert their gaze. Nobody seems overly upset by the saturation coverage in an airport of an airbus averting disaster. Larry King seemed to enjoy covering the airline incident. With a guest on the line, he noted that “JetBlue has satellite TV. They get…

Don’t stay at the Day’s Inn. It was booked on my behalf, sight unseen. The $69/night rate should have been a red flag. Fred, the photographer I’m travelling with, rolled a towel at the base of his door to keep out mice. A sign in the elevator: Maximum 7 people (or 2000 lbs) Do not overload. The elevator will get stuck if it’s overloaded. PLEASE DON’T OVERLOAD! Candy and chips available at Reception. Good luck finding something to read. The National Post is everywhere, which says nothing about the literacy rate. There are more RV and CAT dealers than Tim Horton’s locations. I interviewed a half-dozen Aboriginal welder inmates today.…

Vancouver > Mission Calgary > Drumheller Edmonton. Slammer Tour ’05 rolls on. I’ve met so many killers and bank robbers, I can’t remember them all. All on the shop floors of CORCAN work rehabilitation facilities. Aside from the products these convicted federal inmates produce (such as refurbished DND trucks, mattresses, security bars (ironically) for sale at Home Depot) the remarkable thing is, many are eager to talk. And the theme that has emerged is simple. “Most of us are getting out.” Andre is serving 25-to-life for killing someone in a drunken bar brawl 13 years ago. “We need something to do when we walk out of here, so we don’t…

I can hardly type tonight. The strep is gone, though I’m still on antibiotics. What’s getting to me is being so busy. Today I sent the final artwork for the Porchlight bulb box to press, confirmed almost $150,000 of new writing business at work, and ordered 30,000 light bulbs. 20,000 more are being ordered next month. And last week the government of PEI’s climate change hub said they want to get a free bulb to every house in PEI next spring. Amazing! Someone said to me this week that I will be able to sell greenhouse gas credits to China. I think I’ll swap them for surround sound. Check out…

I felt just “Off” last week. By Friday I had a tickle in the back of my throat. Several people at work said, “You look sick.” They were all over 35, so I don’t think they meant “awesome.” By Saturday morning, swallowing felt like a flaming golf ball was stuck in my throat. Sorry folks at work: Saturday morning the doctor at the walk-in clinic took the little light, peered deep while I said awe and, recoiled on her armless three-legged stool. “Ten day course of antibiotics.” Somethin’ nasty’s got me. Two days later, my right ear is now plugged and humming, and I have an odd inflamed in-grown hair…